Many women have experienced that sinking feeling when an overly persistent stranger just won’t take a hint.
Whether it’s being followed through a store or cornered at a social gathering, these encounters can leave us feeling uneasy, stressed, and downright frustrated.
It’s a situation I’ve found myself in more often than I’d like to admit. I tried ignoring the comments at first, hoping a polite smile or a simple “no thanks” would do the trick.
Unfortunately, I discovered that some people interpret polite indifference as an invitation to push further.
Rather than continue feeling anxious or resentful, I decided to take a more direct approach.
I came up with ten simple phrases that let me clearly communicate my boundaries without being aggressive.
At first, I worried about sounding rude. But honestly, putting these lines into practice has saved me a lot of mental energy—and it’s helped me feel a whole lot safer. It might do the same for you, so read on.
1. “I’m just here to enjoy my time, thank you.”
At first, this phrase felt almost too polite. But I’ve found that leading with gratitude (“thank you”) softens the tension.
It lets the other person know I’m not out to embarrass or belittle them, and I appreciate the compliment or attention—even if I don’t want it.
For me, it was a way of saying, “I hear you, but I’m not interested.” If they continue pushing after that, at least they can’t say I was being ungracious.
I like this line when I’m reading a book at a park or trying to chill in a coffee shop, and someone decides to hover.
It quickly establishes that I’m there for myself, not to strike up conversation with a stranger.
Most people back off nicely. And for those who persist, I keep my expression neutral and simply repeat the phrase.
If they still won’t stop, I remove myself from the situation, guilt-free.
2. “I’m actually in the middle of something important.”
When a stranger won’t leave me alone, especially if they keep asking prying questions, I find this statement helps me step away without feeling like I owe them more explanation.
I’m respectful but also firm that I have a life and priorities. It shows I can’t sit around entertaining persistent requests for attention.
One time, a man at the library insisted on showing me videos on his phone, even though I had my own research to do.
I repeated that I was in the middle of a project and needed to stay focused.
By emphasizing that my task was crucial, I managed to get back to work without further interruption. He eventually took the hint.
For me, it’s a go-to when I want to assert my personal space while maintaining civility in shared settings.
3. “I’m not comfortable continuing this conversation.”
This one is a bit stronger than the first two because it makes my boundary crystal clear.
It says, “You’ve crossed into territory that makes me uneasy.”
If the person keeps pushing, that’s on them, not on me.
I’ve lost count of the times I’ve tried to subtly shift away, only to have the other person shift closer. That’s when a direct statement works best.
I used to worry that being direct meant being confrontational. But according to Psych Central, directness is often the kindest and most effective way to set healthy boundaries.
By naming my discomfort, I’m taking ownership of the situation. It can be as simple as calmly saying this line and then either changing the subject or physically removing myself.
Yes, it might surprise the person, but it also gives them a clear signal that I’m no longer open to conversation.
4. “Thanks for the offer, but I’m good.”
Speaking of directness, when a pushy individual insists on buying me a drink or continuing to chat, a concise refusal can be surprisingly powerful.
Adding “I’m good” signals confidence. It shows that I’m not seeking an alternative solution—I’m happy as I am.
I remember a time at a networking event where a guy insisted on “showing me around.”
He meant well at first, but he started following me, introducing me to people I already knew, and hovering over me the entire evening.
I found that saying, “Thanks for the offer, but I’m good,” was all it took to create distance.
It was polite enough to acknowledge his intentions yet firm enough to end the conversation gracefully.
5. “I have other plans, but take care.”
This phrase works well outside of a party environment. Maybe someone is pushing you for a coffee date or a quick chat when you’ve already said no.
Sometimes, stating that I have plans—even if it’s just plans with myself to go home and watch my favorite show—helps cut off further negotiation. I don’t owe them details.
Once, a persistent acquaintance kept asking me to join them for lunch after I’d already declined multiple times.
They would follow up with “How about tomorrow?” or “Are you free next week?”
Repeating, “I have other plans, but take care,” created a consistent response that left less room for doubt.
After a while, they realized I wasn’t going to budge. It’s polite but final, which is exactly what I need in these scenarios.
6. “Thank you, but I’m really not interested.”
A lot of unwanted attention starts with compliments or flattery.
Maybe someone says they love my outfit or can’t stop staring at me. It can feel awkward to respond because part of me appreciates the compliment, but another part wants to avoid leading them on.
That’s where this phrase comes in handy.
I’ve noticed that acknowledging the compliment—saying “thank you”—can keep things polite, but then I immediately draw the line: “I’m really not interested.”
There’s no need to elaborate or apologize.
Sometimes, they come back with questions like “Why not?” but I don’t have to give them a reason. This line stands on its own.
It might feel strange the first couple of times, but it’s a lifesaver when someone insists on pushing beyond what’s comfortable.
7. “I’d like to keep my distance. Please respect that.”
Physical boundaries are just as important as verbal ones.
If someone is crowding my personal space or repeatedly trying to hug me when I’m not comfortable, I’ve found this phrase essential.
It’s firm and unambiguous: I have a right to my own space, and I’m asking them to honor that.
Once, during a work conference, a person I’d just met kept leaning in, touching my arm, and standing too close while talking.
After politely stepping back several times, I had to say, “I’d like to keep my distance. Please respect that.” It halted the behavior instantly.
Granted, it felt awkward for a second, but I’d rather deal with that moment of awkwardness than endure ongoing physical discomfort.
Setting that boundary makes it clear that I won’t tolerate disrespect for my personal space.
8. “I need to get going now—have a good night.”
Some people test the waters in social settings like bars or parties.
They assume that if they keep talking, I’ll eventually give in and chat.
In those moments, simply declaring that it’s time for me to leave is often the best way to physically remove myself from the situation.
I don’t linger to see if they have more to say. This is my cue to exit.
I tried this at a friend’s birthday party when a guest I barely knew started telling me all about his personal woes, then questioned why I wasn’t more engaged.
It was draining and uncomfortable, so I said, “I need to get going now—have a good night,” and walked away.
It felt a bit abrupt, but it saved me from enduring a one-sided conversation that wasn’t respecting my boundaries.
Wrapping up
Over time, I’ve learned there’s no shame in setting firm boundaries when someone is being invasive or too persistent.
The important part is that I advocate for my own comfort and well-being. Each of these phrases sends a clear message that I value my space and my right to say no without guilt.
For the most part, people respect that clarity once they hear it.
It’s also helped me feel more confident when I’m out and about. Rather than anticipating awkward interactions and fumbling for a response, I know exactly what to say—and how to say it.
If you’ve ever dealt with unwanted attention, consider rehearsing a few phrases that resonate with you.
The goal isn’t to pick fights or hurt anyone’s feelings; it’s to protect your peace.
In the end, standing up for yourself can feel empowering, and that sense of self-assurance is worth everything.
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