Body language says a lot about us—often more than we realize. A confident handshake, steady eye contact, or open posture can make all the difference in how people perceive us.
But not everyone naturally picks up on these unspoken cues. In fact, people with below-average social skills often display subtle body language habits that might be working against them—without even knowing it.
The good news? Awareness is the first step to change. Once you recognize these habits, you can start making small adjustments that improve the way you connect with others.
Here are eight common body language mistakes to watch out for.
1) Avoiding eye contact too often
Eye contact is one of the most powerful ways we connect with others. It shows confidence, attentiveness, and sincerity.
But for those with below-average social skills, avoiding eye contact can become an unintentional habit—one that makes interactions feel awkward or distant.
Of course, not everyone who struggles with eye contact lacks social skills. Some people are just shy or introverted.
But if you find yourself frequently looking away, staring at the floor, or focusing on something else during conversations, it could be making it harder for people to engage with you.
The key isn’t to stare intensely (that would be even worse), but to find a natural balance. A little more eye contact can go a long way in making conversations feel smoother and more connected.
2) Fidgeting when talking to others
I used to have a terrible habit of tapping my fingers on the table whenever I talked to someone. I never even realized I was doing it—until a friend pointed it out.
Once I became aware of it, I started noticing all the other little things I did without thinking: adjusting my watch, shifting in my seat, playing with my sleeves.
It wasn’t that I was nervous—I just wasn’t fully present in the conversation.
Fidgeting can make you seem anxious or distracted, even when you’re not. And while small movements here and there are normal, constantly fiddling with something can make others feel like you’d rather be somewhere else.
If this sounds familiar, try keeping your hands still and focusing more on the person you’re speaking with. You might be surprised how much more engaged—and confident—you come across.
3) Crossing arms too often
Body language speaks before we even say a word, and crossed arms are one of the most commonly misinterpreted signals.
While it might just be a comfortable position, it often comes across as defensive, closed-off, or even unfriendly.
Studies have shown that people are less likely to approach or engage with someone who has their arms crossed. It creates a physical barrier that signals disinterest or discomfort, even when that’s not the intention.
If you often find yourself crossing your arms during conversations, try keeping them at your sides or using hand gestures to emphasize your words.
A more open posture can make you seem more approachable and engaged—without saying a thing.
4) Standing too close (or too far away)
Personal space is a tricky thing—it varies based on culture, situation, and even the relationship between two people. But one thing is certain: standing too close or too far away can make interactions uncomfortable.
If you invade someone’s personal space, they might instinctively lean away or feel uneasy, even if they don’t say anything.
On the other hand, standing too far back can make you seem disinterested or distant, creating an awkward disconnect in conversation.
A good rule of thumb is to pay attention to the other person’s body language. If they subtly step back, you might be too close.
If they lean in or struggle to hear you, you might be too far. Finding the right balance helps conversations feel more natural and comfortable for both sides.
5) Weak or awkward handshakes
I’ll never forget the first time someone told me my handshake was too weak.
I was in a professional setting, and after introducing myself, the person I was meeting gave me a polite smile and said, “You might want to work on that handshake.” I was embarrassed—but also grateful.
A handshake might seem like a small detail, but it sets the tone for an interaction. Too weak, and it can make you seem unsure of yourself.
Too strong, and it can feel aggressive. I used to worry so much about not squeezing too hard that I ended up barely gripping at all.
After that experience, I started paying attention to how I shook hands. A firm but natural grip, a couple of seconds of eye contact, and a slight smile made all the difference.
It’s amazing how something so simple can change the way people perceive you.
6) Nodding too much
Nodding is supposed to show that you’re listening and engaged—but if you do it too much, it can have the opposite effect.
Instead of coming across as interested, excessive nodding can make you seem overly eager to please or even insincere.
I’ve seen people nod so frequently during conversations that it almost looks like they’re rushing the other person along. Others nod at everything, regardless of whether they actually agree or understand what’s being said.
A well-timed nod can reinforce a point and show you’re paying attention, but constant nodding can make it seem like you’re not really thinking about the conversation at all.
Instead of defaulting to nodding, try mixing in other forms of engagement—like verbal affirmations or thoughtful pauses—so your responses feel more natural.
7) Forcing a smile
Smiling is one of the easiest ways to appear friendly and approachable—but not all smiles send the right message. When a smile is forced, it can make you seem uncomfortable, insincere, or even untrustworthy.
Most people can subconsciously tell the difference between a genuine smile and a fake one.
A real smile involves not just the mouth but also the eyes, creating natural creases at the corners. A forced smile, on the other hand, often looks stiff or disappears too quickly.
If you catch yourself forcing a smile in social situations, don’t feel like you have to. Instead, focus on being present in the conversation.
When you’re truly engaged, your expressions will naturally reflect how you feel—making your smiles more authentic and meaningful.
8) Lacking facial expressions
If you rarely show emotion on your face, people might struggle to connect with you—even if you’re fully engaged in the conversation.
A blank or overly neutral expression can make you seem uninterested, unapproachable, or difficult to read.
Facial expressions are one of the most powerful ways we communicate. A slight raise of the eyebrows shows curiosity, a small smile signals warmth, and a furrowed brow conveys thoughtfulness.
Without these subtle cues, conversations can feel flat or even awkward.
If this is something you struggle with, try paying more attention to how your face reacts in conversations. You don’t need to exaggerate your expressions—just let them naturally reflect what you’re thinking and feeling.
It makes a bigger difference than you might realize.
Why body language matters more than you think
Most of the time, we don’t think about our body language—we just move, react, and carry on. But whether we realize it or not, these small, unconscious habits shape how others see us and how we connect with the world around us.
The good news? Body language isn’t set in stone. Once you notice certain patterns, you can start making small adjustments that help you come across as more confident, engaged, and approachable.
Albert Mehrabian’s research on communication suggests that up to 55% of our messaging comes from body language alone. That means people aren’t just listening to what you say—they’re reading everything else too.
So next time you’re in a conversation, pay a little more attention to what your body is saying. You might be surprised by how much of a difference it makes.
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