You can’t always judge a book by its cover, and relationships are no different.
Sometimes, a couple that seems perfectly content on the surface might be hiding some deep-rooted issues. They’re ‘fake happy,’ a term psychologists use to describe couples who portray an ideal image while struggling privately.
Unmasking this façade isn’t about prying or being nosy—it’s about understanding human behavior better, which can be extremely useful in personal relationships and even business interactions.
In this article, we’ll delve into 7 subtle signs that indicate a couple is ‘fake happy,’ according to psychology.
And who knows? You might just gain some insights that could help strengthen your own relationships or even your approach to handling your business partnerships.
1) Overcompensating happiness
There’s an age-old saying, “Actions speak louder than words.”
Well, psychologist Dr. Carl Jung took it a step further by stating, “You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do.” This applies perfectly to our first sign – overcompensating happiness.
Couples that are ‘fake happy’ often overcompensate by being overly affectionate or excessively cheerful in public. They are trying to convince others – and perhaps themselves – that everything is perfect.
This exaggerated display of happiness can be a defense mechanism to hide underlying issues.
Keep an eye out for this behavior. It’s not about being skeptical of every happy couple you meet. Rather, it’s about understanding that constant over-the-top positivity may not always reflect the reality of a relationship.
As with all human behavior, balance is key. A never-ending parade of joy might just be a mask for deeper issues.
2) Lack of personal interactions
Another subtle sign that a couple might be ‘fake happy’ is a noticeable lack of personal interactions.
I remember a couple I used to know. They’d always show up at social gatherings together, smiling and holding hands. But once they settled in, they’d barely interact with each other for the rest of the evening. This behavior struck me as odd.
In the wise words of renowned psychologist Abraham Maslow, “What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself.”
Being constantly together yet emotionally distant could indicate underlying issues in a relationship. It’s as if they’re present physically but absent emotionally.
In the case of this couple, it later turned out that they were struggling with communication issues and eventually decided to part ways. Their lack of interaction was a subtle sign, hinting at bigger problems beneath the surface.
3) They avoid touching each other
Ever noticed how some couples seem to instinctively lean away from each other, almost as though there’s a magnetic force pushing them apart? It’s a subtle sign, but one that can indicate that a couple is ‘fake happy.’
Renowned psychologist Sigmund Freud once said, “Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.”
This could very well be the case with couples who shy away from physical touch. It’s as if their bodies are expressing the discomfort or dissatisfaction that they’re not voicing out loud.
Touch is a fundamental form of human connection. When a couple is genuinely happy, you’ll often see them naturally gravitate towards each other, whether it’s holding hands, a gentle brush of the arm, or even just sitting close together.
If this is conspicuously lacking, it might be time to question why.
4) Constantly agreeing with each other
Sometimes, couples might think that agreeing on everything is a sign of a strong relationship. However, this could be a subtle hint that they’re ‘fake happy.’
A study published showed that people often agree with others to avoid conflict, even when they have different opinions. This behavior is known as ‘acquiescence bias.’
In a healthy and authentic relationship, it’s normal and even beneficial to have disagreements. It shows that both parties feel safe enough to express their individual thoughts and feelings.
On the other hand, constant agreement could indicate fear of conflict or a lack of depth in the relationship.
So, next time you see a couple who seems to be on the same page about absolutely everything, take it with a pinch of salt. It might just be a mask for underlying issues.
5) They’re always on their phones
In this digital age, it’s not unusual to see people glued to their screens. But when a couple is constantly on their phones even when they’re together, it might be a sign of ‘fake happiness.’
In my own experience, I’ve noticed that couples who are genuinely happy and content in their relationship often put their phones away to focus on each other. They understand the value of being present and interacting with each other.
Legendary psychologist Albert Bandura once said, “In order to succeed, people need a sense of self-efficacy, strive together towards a common goal and be committed.”
This rings true in relationships as well. If a couple is more interested in their virtual world than each other, it can indicate a lack of commitment or connection.
Remember, genuine happiness often comes from real, face-to-face interactions, not just virtual ones.
6) Perfect social media image
In a world dominated by social media, it’s easy to get caught up in the picture-perfect lives displayed on our screens. But when a couple’s online image seems too good to be true, it might be a sign they’re ‘fake happy.’
Psychologist Leon Festinger’s theory of social comparison suggests that people have an inherent drive to compare themselves to others. In the context of relationships, couples might feel compelled to portray an idealized image on social media to keep up with perceived societal standards.
However, as Carl Rogers, another prominent psychologist, once said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” This applies to relationships too. A couple at ease with their relationship doesn’t need constant validation from others.
So if you see a couple whose social media life seems flawless, remember that real relationships have ups and downs, and that’s perfectly okay. The constant strive for perfection might just be a smokescreen for deeper issues.
7) Lack of future plans
Lastly, a couple might be ‘fake happy’ if they rarely discuss or make future plans together.
As psychologist Erik Erikson stated, “Hope is both the earliest and the most indispensable virtue inherent in the state of being alive.”
A lack of future-oriented conversations might signify a lack of hope or commitment in the relationship.
Genuine happiness in a relationship often involves envisioning and planning a shared future, however uncertain it might be. If that’s missing, it could be a subtle sign of underlying issues.
Final thoughts
Human relationships are complex and multifaceted, and romantic relationships are no exception. They require effort, understanding, and most importantly, authenticity to thrive.
While these ‘fake happy’ signs might raise some red flags, it’s essential to remember that no relationship is perfect. We all have our ups and downs, and sometimes we put on a brave face for the world while dealing with our struggles privately.
The key is in recognizing the signs and understanding that it’s okay to ask for help or seek guidance when needed. In doing so, we can foster healthier relationships—both with ourselves and with others—and pave the way towards genuine happiness.
After all, life isn’t about creating a perfect picture but rather about embracing the beauty in our imperfections.
And who knows? Maybe the journey towards authenticity might just bring us closer to the happiness we seek.
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