Some folks ask questions that make your stomach twist the moment you hear them.
They’re usually the kind of questions most people know to avoid, because they dig into private topics or make the listener feel on the spot.
Over the years, I’ve noticed a pattern: those who keep posing these awkward inquiries often struggle with basic social awareness.
It doesn’t always come from a mean place—sometimes they’re just unaware or under-skilled at reading signals. Either way, these moments can leave you feeling cornered.
Below are 9 questions that indicate, if someone keeps asking them, they likely have below-average social skills, You’ll also find a few ways to set healthy boundaries and steer the conversation toward safer ground.
1. “Why don’t you have kids yet?”
This question cuts deeply for many people.
It might be a sore spot if they’re trying to conceive, don’t want children, or have health complications they’re not ready to discuss.
Someone with decent social sensitivity understands how personal this is.
They either wait for you to volunteer information or sense you’d prefer to keep it private. But when a person pushes the subject repeatedly, it reveals a disconnect from what’s appropriate.
I’ve seen it happen in casual get-togethers, where one guest relentlessly presses another on the matter. It’s uncomfortable and can ruin the entire mood.
A better approach would be to wait for the other person to mention parenthood, if they ever choose to.
2. “When are you getting married?”
Friends or relatives who can’t stop asking about wedding plans can make you feel like you’re behind on some invisible schedule.
The reality is, relationships are personal.
Not everyone wants to get married, and even if they do, it may not be anytime soon. Over and over, I’ve watched people forced into awkward explanations or deflective answers.
If someone refuses to grasp why this might be sensitive, it often hints at a lack of emotional attunement.
They’re ignoring potential reasons, such as financial concerns, relationship doubts, or past traumas. Repeatedly prying into marriage plans is a surefire way to signal below-average social understanding.
3. “How much did that cost?”
Talking about money can feel invasive if it’s not offered willingly.
Sometimes, close friends share details—maybe you want to compare mortgage rates or budgeting tips.
But when asked by someone who isn’t close to you, it comes across as prying.
People who are socially aware realize this can be a sensitive area and typically tread lightly. If someone pushes you for exact numbers about your house, car, or vacation, they may think it’s just curiosity.
In truth, they might be crossing a line.
That line is especially apparent if they ignore your polite attempts to change the subject, continuing to dig for specifics.
4. “Why are you still single?”
This one stings, especially when life circumstances or personal preferences are in play.
Being single isn’t a deficiency.
Yet, the question frames it as such.
I’ve had acquaintances ask others this in group settings, turning what should be a casual hangout into a tense interrogation. They see no harm in it because they assume everyone shares their timeline or priorities.
In reality, someone could be happily single, recently heartbroken, or battling issues they’d rather keep private.
A person with higher social intelligence senses the delicate nature of that topic. They wait for cues before discussing relationships—if you don’t bring it up, they respect that boundary.
Research in this 2020 article also discusses social intelligence’s role in well-being and highlights how deficits can impact relationships.
5. “What’s up with your weight?”
Whether someone’s gained or lost pounds, calling it out can be deeply uncomfortable. Our bodies are tied to health, self-esteem, cultural norms, and more.
No one wants a random person playing commentator on their weight.
If you do want advice or support, you’ll typically invite it from people you trust.
Those who point-blank ask, “Why are you so skinny?” or “Are you packing on pounds?” lack a filter. It often shows they have minimal empathy for how personal this topic is.
They might assume a casual tone, but it doesn’t lessen the sting.
It’s often best to shut down this conversation or redirect as soon as you sense where it’s headed.
6. “Aren’t you over that yet?”
This question pops up in all sorts of contexts: a breakup, a loss, a fallout with a friend.
Healing isn’t uniform, and it isn’t quick.
Telling someone they should be past their pain by now trivializes what they’ve endured. A socially attuned person understands that each individual has unique coping mechanisms and timelines.
If someone keeps pressing, “But it’s been months—why aren’t you over it?” they’re dismissing the complexity of grief or personal struggle.
This behavior can make you feel rushed to “recover,” even when you’re not ready.
People who are short on social skills might think they’re offering tough love, but it usually comes off as insensitive, especially if it’s not asked in a caring context.
7. “When are you getting a ‘real’ job?”
In today’s world, there’s a spectrum of job types—from freelancing to remote work to unconventional entrepreneurial paths.
Calling one job “real” and implying another is not reveals narrow thinking.It also disregards the person’s chosen career or current life phase.
I remember when I switched gears from running multiple businesses to focusing on research and writing.
Some relatives couldn’t grasp what my “work” even was.
They’d poke and prod, asking when I’d get back to a “normal” career.
This line of questioning showed me they had little empathy for my goals. They simply wanted to fit me into their definition of professional success.
8. “Are you sure you should eat that?”
This question can strike a nerve if someone already feels self-conscious about their eating habits or diet.
Food choices can be tied to culture, health constraints, or emotional comfort.
Those with a decent social IQ know better than to comment on another person’s plate—unless there’s a strong reason or an invitation to discuss it.
If you find someone repeatedly making remarks about your meals, they might be overlooking social norms about personal boundaries.
It can also veer into shaming territory, especially if they imply you’re making a poor choice.
Best to politely but firmly shut it down if it persists.
You decide what you eat.
9. “How come you never invite me anymore?”
Sometimes it’s asked lightly, but often there’s an undercurrent of guilt or accusation. If someone repeatedly presses you on why they’re left out, there’s a reason you’ve created distance.
Maybe your interests have changed, or you felt the friendship wasn’t balanced.
An individual with better social awareness might quietly sense that the dynamic has shifted.
They’d approach gently or respect your space.
But if they keep demanding an explanation in front of others, they’re ignoring your signals.
They’re placing the burden on you to explain something sensitive, which can create an awkward scene. That’s not how emotionally intelligent people handle social disconnections.
Why it happens
A significant chunk of these awkward questions stems from poor social awareness. Some people truly don’t know what’s off-limits or why certain topics are sensitive.
A handful might deal with anxiety, which can make them blurt out what’s on their mind without filtering.
Others may have grown up in environments where personal questions were fair game, never learning that many adults prefer more respectful boundaries.
In many cases, there’s no malicious intent—they’re trying to make conversation or satisfy curiosity.
But that doesn’t make the question any less uncomfortable.
Sometimes we just need to remember that social intelligence is learned over time, and not everyone is caught up.
If you suspect you’re dealing with someone who lacks these skills, you might recall the Mayo Clinic’s guidance on social anxiety, which notes that anxiety could factor into misreading social cues.
And if someone consistently disregards boundaries, it may reflect a deeper gap in their ability to empathize or interact appropriately.
Moving forward
Setting boundaries becomes essential when these questions keep popping up.
If it feels safe, try a polite but firm response like, “I’m not comfortable discussing that right now.”
You can also steer the conversation to a neutral topic, such as mutual interests or broader current events.
Remind yourself that you don’t owe anyone personal details about your life, especially if they haven’t earned that trust.
If their curiosity persists and they continue crossing lines, consider limiting your interactions for your own peace of mind.
Staying calm and collected helps prevent an already awkward moment from escalating further. Ultimately, your well-being matters more than indulging someone else’s intrusive questions.
Feeling stuck in self-doubt?
Stop trying to fix yourself and start embracing who you are. Join the free 7-day self-discovery challenge and learn how to transform negative emotions into personal growth.
