If you want to feel truly confident in your skin as you age, say goodbye to these 8 habits

It’s not always the big, dramatic lifestyle changes that shape our confidence levels as we get older.

Often, it’s the small, repeated habits—the ones that slip under the radar—that slowly chip away at our self-esteem and sense of personal power.

I’ve had my share of bad habits, from overworking myself in my startup days to relying a little too heavily on fast food in my early 20s. Over time, I realized these daily patterns do more than just add inches to your waistline or wrinkles to your face—they also zap your confidence.

I’ve read plenty of books on habit change, motivation, and self-improvement, and I’ve learned that building genuine confidence involves knowing which habits to keep and which ones to ditch.

So, if you want to feel strong and self-assured for the long haul, here are eight habits it’s time to say goodbye to.

1. Negative self-talk

Let’s start with the voice inside your head.

It’s the unrelenting critic that tells you you’re not good enough, smart enough, or talented enough. That voice might have popped up years ago, but if it’s still playing on repeat, it’s doing a number on your confidence today.

I once caught myself saying, “I’m just terrible at managing finances,” every time I paid bills. It may have seemed harmless at first, but it turned into a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I’d overlook small charges or deadlines because, hey, I’d already written myself off as “terrible” at money matters.

The folks at Verywell Mind stand behind this, noting that negative self-talk can indeed sabotage your self-esteem.

The good news? You can shift that internal narrative.

Try replacing harsh words with gentler ones: “I can get better at this,” or “I’m learning.” Yes, it might feel awkward or silly at first, but your brain responds to the stories you tell it.

2. Slacking on sleep

If there’s one habit that’s way too easy to slip into, it’s skimping on sleep.

Maybe you binge late-night shows. Maybe you lie awake scrolling through social media. Next thing you know, it’s 2 a.m. and you’re still not asleep. Then morning hits, and you feel groggy, moody, and off your game.

Over time, a lack of quality sleep can affect everything from your concentration to your immune system—and let’s be real, it also wreaks havoc on your confidence.

I learned this the hard way.

In my startup phase, I treated sleep as optional, substituting caffeine and hustle for proper rest. My work might have been okay in the short term, but my personal confidence tanked. I felt like I was constantly behind, mentally fuzzy, and more prone to comparing myself to others.

The crew at Healthline has highlighted that consistent sleep deprivation can lead to mood swings, diminished cognitive function, and even a higher risk of anxiety or depression. All of this adds up to feeling less sure of yourself.

Give yourself a bedtime, create a wind-down routine, and watch how much more centered you feel in your own skin.

3. Being sedentary

Physical movement isn’t just about sculpting the perfect beach body.

It’s about building a foundation of energy and vitality that carries over into every aspect of life.

If you spend most of your time hunched over a laptop, glued to a couch, or refusing to take the stairs, you might be undermining your self-assurance without even realizing it.

I started working out regularly in my late 20s. Before that, I’d find any excuse not to hit the gym—too busy, too tired, too bored.

But the more I committed to short workouts (even just a quick jog or home workout), the more confident I felt in my body. And that confidence spilled into how I interacted with people and tackled professional challenges.

It’s not about having six-pack abs; it’s about feeling strong and capable from the inside out.

As James Clear points out, “Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become.”

Even a 10-minute walk at lunch or a couple of push-ups between tasks can do wonders for your mood and mindset.

4. Mindless scrolling on social media

Speaking of distractions, let’s talk social media.

Sure, it can be a great way to keep in touch with friends or find inspiration. But it can quickly turn into a comparison trap, leaving you feeling like your life isn’t nearly as glamorous or exciting as everyone else’s.

It’s all too easy to lose an hour scrolling through vacation photos, fitness updates, or carefully curated “perfect” lives—and emerge feeling worse about your own.

I’ve mentioned this before but cutting down on mindless scrolling was one of the best decisions I ever made for my mental health.

I used to check social feeds every time I had a spare second. But the more time I spent looking at other people’s highlight reels, the less confident I felt in my own path.

Stepping back and setting boundaries—like deleting the app from my phone on weekends—helped me regain clarity and self-assurance.

5. Overindulging in junk food

There’s no need to eliminate your favorite snacks or occasional treats.

But let’s not fool ourselves: a steady diet of greasy takeout, sugary drinks, and heavily processed food can eventually drain your energy, make you feel lethargic, and leave you less satisfied in your own skin.

It’s not just about weight gain either—when you don’t feel nourished, it’s hard to feel confident.

When I was launching my first business, I practically lived on energy drinks and drive-thru burgers. Sure, it kept me going for a while, but the inevitable crash always left me anxious and irritable. Over time, that endless cycle took a toll on both my body and self-esteem.

One practical tip is to find simple swaps—like having grilled chicken instead of fried, or choosing water over soda. Small changes can add up.

Tim Ferriss once said, “Focus on being productive instead of busy.” That also applies to how you eat—focus on nourishing your body rather than just feeding it for convenience.

6. Ignoring mental and emotional health

Ever shove a difficult emotion under the rug, telling yourself you’ll deal with it later?

If you keep brushing your mental health aside, you’ll never really stand on solid ground when it comes to confidence.

We live in a fast-paced society where mental health can feel like an afterthought. But that stress or anxiety you’re ignoring doesn’t just disappear—it lingers, saps your energy, and eventually shows up as self-doubt.

I used to believe therapy was only for people with “serious problems,” which is a myth. Once I started talking to a professional about my stress levels and mood swings, I realized how much better I felt when I acknowledged my emotions rather than denying them.

These days, mindfulness routines, journaling, or even just a quick phone call to a friend help me process feelings more effectively.

Your emotional well-being is just as crucial as your physical health—don’t let it fall by the wayside.

Even if it’s a simple step like jotting down one thing you’re grateful for each day, that regular check-in with yourself can boost your resilience and self-confidence.

7. Holding onto toxic relationships

How often do you find yourself in a one-sided friendship or relationship, desperately trying to gain approval or acceptance?

It’s exhausting, and it chips away at your sense of self-worth. If someone consistently puts you down or keeps you second-guessing your value, it might be time to cut ties or at least set firmer boundaries.

I once worked with a friend on a creative project, and I soon realized he was turning everything into a competition. It drained me. My ideas were constantly shot down, and I felt small around him.

Letting go was tough—after all, we had a long history—but my confidence soared once I did. There’s a feeling of liberation when you decide you deserve better treatment.

You don’t need everyone to like you, but you do need people around you who respect and support you. The biggest favor you can do for yourself is to surround your life with positive, genuine connections.

8. Resisting new experiences

Closing it out, but not to be overlooked: the fear of stepping outside your comfort zone can keep your self-confidence stuck on pause.

Maybe it’s the fear of looking foolish or the worry that you’ll fail. The problem is, staying in a bubble of familiar routines denies you the chance to prove you can handle something new.

I used to be terrified of public speaking. I remember my first time standing in front of a small crowd, palms sweating, heart pounding.

But afterward, I felt this amazing rush—like I’d unlocked a new level of self-trust.

Trying new experiences doesn’t guarantee you’ll succeed, but it does guarantee growth. And with growth comes confidence.

Wrapping up

Habits make us who we are.

Sometimes they lift us up, sometimes they hold us back.

If you recognize even one or two of these eight habits in your life, it’s not a sign to beat yourself up. It’s an opportunity to make a change and level up your self-assurance.

Remember: confidence isn’t about perfection—it’s about showing up for yourself consistently, treating yourself with kindness, and being open to growth.

You don’t need to overhaul your entire life overnight. Start with one habit.

Maybe you’ll choose to catch negative self-talk and replace it with more supportive language. Or maybe you’ll commit to getting an extra half-hour of sleep.

Whichever path you pick, give it time and patience. The impact on your mindset and long-term well-being will be worth it.

Feeling stuck in self-doubt?

Stop trying to fix yourself and start embracing who you are. Join the free 7-day self-discovery challenge and learn how to transform negative emotions into personal growth.

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Picture of Ethan Sterling

Ethan Sterling

Ethan Sterling has a background in entrepreneurship, having started and managed several small businesses. His journey through the ups and downs of entrepreneurship provides him with practical insights into personal resilience, strategic thinking, and the value of persistence. Ethan’s articles offer real-world advice for those looking to grow personally and professionally.

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