Confidence is key, especially when it comes to public speaking. However, there are certain habits that can hold you back from truly shining.
Kicking these habits to the curb is crucial if you want to become a self-assured orator. They might seem harmless, but trust me, they’re not doing you any favors.
In this article, we’re going to delve into the 10 habits you need to bid farewell to if you’re serious about improving your speaking prowess.
Let’s get started.
1) Filler words
We’ve all been there. You’re standing in front of an audience, nerves kicking in, and suddenly your speech is sprinkled with “umms”, “ahhs”, and “likes”.
These filler words might seem insignificant, but they can seriously undermine your credibility as a speaker. They indicate uncertainty and make your message sound less powerful.
Often, we use these words subconsciously when we’re trying to gather our thoughts. However, they can become a distracting habit if not checked.
The key is awareness. Start by recognizing when you use filler words, then make a conscious effort to eliminate them from your speech.
It’s okay to pause. In fact, silence can be a powerful tool in public speaking. It gives you time to collect your thoughts, and it keeps the audience engaged.
2) Speed Talking
Once, during the early days of my speaking career, I found myself on stage, heart pounding, and words rushing out of my mouth like a whirlwind. It was as if I was in a race against time.
Speed talking is a common habit among nervous speakers. We think that if we can just get the words out faster, we’ll be done with the nerve-wracking experience sooner. But all we’re doing is robbing our message of its impact.
I learned the hard way that speaking too quickly makes it difficult for your audience to keep up, absorb your message, and engage with your content.
Since then, I’ve made an effort to slow down, pace my speech and emphasize crucial points. Taking a deep breath before starting to speak also helps in controlling the pace.
3) Lack of Eye Contact
Did you know that in one-on-one conversations, people typically hold eye contact for 7 to 10 seconds? In public speaking, the rule changes slightly, but the principle remains the same. Eye contact is crucial.
Avoiding eye contact can make you seem less confident and can even make your audience feel disconnected from you. It’s a habit many of us have, especially when we’re feeling nervous.
On the other hand, maintaining eye contact makes your audience feel acknowledged and engaged. It keeps them connected to your message and makes your speech more impactful.
As you work on becoming a confident speaker, don’t shy away from meeting your audience’s gaze. Make it a habit to connect with them through eye contact.
4) Relying on Notes
It’s tempting to have a safety net. A detailed script or set of notes can feel like a life raft when you’re standing in front of a crowd. But here’s the thing – it often does more harm than good.
Relying too heavily on notes can make your speech come across as rehearsed and insincere. It can disconnect you from your audience and hinder the natural flow of your message.
Now, I’m not suggesting you should go in completely unprepared. Knowing your material is crucial. But instead of a complete script, consider using bullet points or key phrases to jog your memory if needed.
Being less dependent on notes will allow you to connect better with your audience and deliver a more engaging and confident speech. So, make it a habit to step away from the safety of your notes.
5) Ignoring Body Language
Words aren’t the only way we communicate. Our bodies speak volumes, often saying more than our actual words do.
Crossed arms can signal defensiveness. Constantly shifting weight from one foot to another can indicate nervousness. Conversely, standing tall with open gestures can portray confidence and command respect.
Your body language can either support or undermine your message. It’s a powerful tool that, when used correctly, can significantly enhance your public speaking skills.
So, if you’re looking to become a more confident speaker, don’t overlook the importance of body language. Embrace it as an integral part of your communication arsenal.
6) Not Believing in Your Message
There’s something truly disheartening about watching a speaker deliver a message they don’t seem to believe in themselves. It diminishes the impact of their words and leaves the audience feeling unengaged.
Confidence in public speaking doesn’t just come from mastering the mechanics. It comes from a deep, unwavering belief in what you’re saying.
If you don’t believe in your message, how can you expect others to? The audience can sense sincerity and passion – it resonates with them and makes your message more impactful.
Therefore, if you’re aiming to become a confident speaker, ensure that you truly believe in what you’re saying. Trust me, your audience will feel the difference.
7) Fear of Making Mistakes
Once, while delivering a speech, I mixed up the points I was supposed to make. Instead of panicking or apologizing profusely, I laughed it off and corrected myself. The audience laughed along, and it actually made them more engaged.
Mistakes happen. They’re a part of being human. But fearing them can turn public speaking into a nerve-wracking ordeal.
Instead of fearing mistakes, embrace them as learning opportunities. The ability to handle mistakes gracefully shows your audience that you’re human too, making you more relatable.
8) Avoiding Difficult Questions
It might seem like the best way to maintain control during public speaking is to sidestep challenging questions. But, believe it or not, doing the opposite can actually boost your credibility.
Handling tough questions head-on shows your audience that you’re knowledgeable and confident in your subject matter. It enhances their trust in you and your message.
Instead of steering clear of difficult questions, welcome them. Prepare for them. And when they come, answer them with honesty and confidence.
9) Neglecting the Power of Storytelling
In public speaking, facts and figures are important, but it’s the stories that truly captivate the audience. Yet, many speakers overlook this powerful tool.
Stories make your message relatable. They engage the audience on an emotional level, making your speech memorable. They can simplify complex information and make your points more impactful.
If you’re striving to become a confident speaker, embrace storytelling. Whether it’s a personal anecdote or a relevant case study, weave it into your speech to engage your audience and enhance your message.
Facts tell, but stories sell. So, don’t neglect the power of storytelling. It’s an essential habit for any confident speaker.
10) Not Practicing Enough
Regardless of your natural talent or speaking skills, there’s no substitute for practice. It’s the cornerstone of becoming a confident speaker.
The more you practice, the better you’ll become. You’ll familiarize yourself with your material, refine your delivery, and learn to handle unexpected situations.
If there’s one habit you need to adopt as you say goodbye to the others, it’s this: Practice. And then practice some more. Because in public speaking, preparation is key.
Final thought: Confidence is a journey
The path to becoming a confident speaker isn’t always a straight line. It’s a journey filled with ups and downs, triumphs and setbacks.
It’s about embracing the uncomfortable and stepping out of the familiar. It’s about learning to be vulnerable in front of an audience, while staying true to your message.
Confidence is not just about what you say, but how you say it. It’s about your body language, your eye contact, your pacing. It’s about believing in yourself and your message.
But above all, it’s about constant growth and improvement. As the legendary basketball coach John Wooden once said, “Success is never final. Failure is never fatal. It’s courage that counts.”
So keep on practicing. Keep on learning. And most importantly, keep on speaking. Every speech, every presentation, every conversation is another step on your journey towards becoming a more confident speaker.
Remember, it’s not about being perfect. It’s about being authentically you. Because at the end of the day, the world needs to hear what you have to say.
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