9 signs someone isn’t a very honest person (even if they seem trustworthy on the surface)

There’s a vast difference between someone who just appears trustworthy and someone who genuinely is.

Detecting dishonesty isn’t always straightforward. Often, these individuals mask their true colors behind a façade of trustworthiness.

Recognizing the signs of dishonesty is crucial. And it seems, there are certain indications that can help you identify the not-so-honest ones.

Here are some telltale signs to watch out for, even when someone appears to be trustworthy.

So, let’s delve into 9 signs someone isn’t a very honest person (even if they seem trustworthy).

1) They’re vague about details

Sometimes, the devil truly is in the details.

When it comes to honesty, the details matter. Honest people are generally open and transparent, and they’re not afraid to share specifics.

But what about the ones who seem trustworthy yet often remain vague about details? That could be a red flag.

If someone consistently avoids providing specific details or frequently gives ambiguous answers, it might be because they’re not being entirely truthful. They might be hiding something or perhaps bending the truth.

Remember, consistency and transparency are key indicators of honesty. So, when these are lacking, it’s time to question the trustworthiness.

2) They avoid eye contact

Ever notice how some people tend to avoid making eye contact when they’re not being completely honest?

I remember a time when I was dealing with a supposed ‘trustworthy’ colleague. We were working on a project together, and I had a nagging feeling that he wasn’t pulling his weight. Whenever I would ask him about his progress, he’d avoid looking me in the eye.

At first, I brushed it off, thinking maybe he was just shy or uncomfortable. But as time passed, his inability to maintain eye contact became more frequent, especially when discussing the project.

It turned out, he was shirking his responsibilities and lying about it. The avoidance of eye contact was a subconscious sign of his dishonesty.

Now, I’m not saying that every person who avoids eye contact is dishonest. But consistent avoidance can be a potential sign. It’s one of those subtle hints that might indicate someone isn’t as honest as they seem to be.

3) Their body language seems off

Body language can be a powerful tool in detecting deceit. Research, such as a study published in the Journal of Nonverbal Behavior, shows that people often unconsciously display signs of discomfort when they’re not being truthful.

For example, they might fidget, touch their face more often, or exhibit nervous ticks. Similarly, crossing arms or legs can be an unconscious attempt to create a barrier, signaling that something is amiss.

So, if you notice someone’s body language is consistently out of sync with their words, it might indicate they’re hiding the truth. Remember, body language can often reveal what words try to conceal.

4) They change the subject quickly

Have you ever noticed how a dishonest person might quickly steer the conversation away from a touchy subject? This could be another sign that someone isn’t as honest as they appear.

When people feel uncomfortable or are trying to hide something, they often change the topic to avoid further scrutiny. It’s a defense mechanism to prevent their deceit from being uncovered.

So, if someone frequently shifts the conversation away from certain topics, especially if those topics might expose inconsistencies in their stories, it’s worth paying attention. This habitual diversion could be a signal that they’re not being entirely truthful.

5) They’re defensive without reason

Defensiveness can be a natural response when someone feels accused. However, if someone often gets defensive without a clear reason, it might be a sign of hidden dishonesty.

Unnecessary defensiveness can be an attempt to deflect attention away from their dishonesty. They may react strongly to simple questions or become overly argumentative to avoid dealing with the truth.

If someone is consistently defensive or reactive, especially about seemingly innocuous questions or topics, it might suggest they’re not as honest as they seem.

6) They break promises regularly

Trust is a delicate thing, built on the foundation of kept promises and consistent honesty. So, when someone consistently breaks their promises, it’s not just disappointing – it can be a sign of deeper dishonesty.

Breaking promises could indicate a disregard for honesty and commitment. It can be as simple as always showing up late despite promising to be on time, or as significant as failing to fulfill major commitments.

If you find that someone frequently breaks their promises, even the small ones, it could be a sign that they’re not as trustworthy as they seem. It’s heartbreaking, especially when you’ve put your faith in them. But recognizing this pattern can save you from further heartache down the line.

7) They have a history of lying

They say the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior. I can attest to this from personal experience. A few years ago, I had a close friend who had a knack for spinning tales. Small lies, nothing too harmful, or so it seemed at the time.

Over time, these small lies became larger, and the trust I had for my friend started to waver. I realized that if he could lie about small things, he could also lie about bigger matters.

This taught me a crucial lesson: a person who has a history of lying is likely to continue the pattern. So, if someone has shown a tendency to be dishonest in the past, it might be a sign that they’re not as honest as they seem. It’s a hard pill to swallow, especially when it involves someone you care about.

8) They blame others constantly

Blame shifting is a common tactic utilized by people who aren’t very honest. Instead of owning up to their mistakes, they prefer to point fingers at others.

This behavior could indicate a lack of accountability and an inability to be honest about their own faults. If someone constantly finds someone else to blame, it may suggest they’re attempting to hide their own dishonesty.

Remember, a trustworthy person accepts their mistakes and learns from them. Constant blame shifting, on the other hand, could be a sign that they’re not as honest as they seem.

9) They’re uncomfortable with honest conversations

Honest people embrace honest conversations. They’re not afraid to face the truth, and they don’t shy away from difficult discussions.

When someone is uncomfortable with this kind of open, truthful communication, it could be a significant sign of their dishonesty. If they dodge direct questions, hesitate to share their feelings, or seem uneasy when you’re being candid, it may indicate they aren’t as honest as they seem.

Honesty is about more than just telling the truth. It’s about being open and authentic in all aspects of communication. If someone consistently struggles with this, it could be a major red flag.

Final thoughts: Honesty is in the heart

Behind every action and every word, there lies a person’s true character. And honesty, one of the most valued character traits, is deeply rooted in the heart.

In the words of Mark Twain, “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.” The beauty of honesty is its simplicity. But sometimes, people can mask their lack of honesty behind a veneer of trustworthiness.

Recognizing these signs isn’t about casting judgment or doubting everyone around you. It’s about understanding human behavior better, protecting yourself from potential harm, and fostering relationships built on genuine trust and honesty.

As you navigate through life, remember these signs and use your judgment wisely. Acknowledge the complexities of human behavior and remember that everyone has their own battles to fight. After all, understanding others begins with understanding oneself.

Honesty isn’t just about telling the truth. It’s about being real with yourself and others about who you are, what you want, and what you need to live your most authentic life. It’s about recognizing that every heart has a story to tell – and that story is worth listening to.