People who are great at small talk always use these 10 clever phrases

Small talk isn’t just idle chit-chat, it’s actually a pretty big deal. Mastering this art can help you connect with anyone, anywhere.

It’s about sparking a conversation that’s engaging, yet easygoing. And guess what? People who have mastered small talk do have a few tricks up their sleeve.

They know that specific phrases can turn awkward silence into enjoyable interaction. Ready to find out what these phrases are?

In this article, you’ll discover the secret language of small talk pros.

Let’s get started.

1) How’s your day going?

Small talk is all about breaking the ice and creating a sense of connection. And there’s no better way to start than by showing genuine interest in the other person’s day.

Whether it’s a casual encounter at the water cooler or an important business meeting, this simple question opens the door for conversation. It invites people to share their experiences, thoughts, and feelings.

The key here isn’t just asking the question, but actively listening to the response. By showing you’re genuinely interested, you’re able to create a bond and encourage further conversation.

In fact, Dale Carnegie, in his famous book “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, emphasizes the importance of showing interest in others as a cornerstone of effective communication.

When you find yourself in a situation where small talk is needed, just ask “How’s your day going?” and let the conversation flow from there.

2) That’s interesting, can you tell me more?

One of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever received about small talk is to encourage the other person to talk about themselves. After all, we’re all experts on our own lives, and most of us enjoy sharing our experiences and insights.

I’ll never forget the time I was at a networking event and found myself chatting with a photographer. I didn’t know much about photography, but instead of letting the conversation die there, I said, “That’s interesting, can you tell me more?”

This phrase did two things: it showed my genuine interest in what he did and it allowed him to share his passion with someone who was genuinely curious. We ended up having a great conversation about his travels and photography, and it all started with this simple phrase.

Small talk isn’t just about filling silence – it’s about building connections. And one of the easiest ways to do that is by showing genuine interest in what others have to say.

3) Have you read any good books lately?

Books are a universal topic of conversation. They offer a wealth of topics to discuss – from the plot and characters to the author’s writing style.

Asking someone about their recent reads not only gives you insight into their interests but also provides potential common ground. And if they haven’t read anything lately, it can easily lead to a discussion on favorite books or authors.

It’s also worth noting that reading is closely linked with empathy. A study published in the journal Science found that reading literary fiction, in particular, can help improve understanding of others’ emotions and beliefs. This shared understanding can help deepen the conversation and establish a connection.

When you’re making small talk, try asking about their latest book. You might just end up in a fascinating conversation and learn something new!

4) I love your shoes, where did you get them?

Compliments are a great conversation starter. They instantly create a positive atmosphere and make the other person feel good.

Whether it’s about their shoes, their bag, or their choice of coffee, people generally appreciate compliments and feel more inclined to engage in conversation after receiving one.

However, remember that the compliment should be genuine. False flattery is easily detected and can quickly turn a pleasant conversation sour.

When you’re stuck for a conversation starter, look for something you genuinely appreciate about the other person and compliment them on it. Not only will it brighten their day, but it could also kick-start an engaging conversation.

5) What’s the best part of your job?

Most people spend a significant portion of their lives at work. So, it’s no surprise that job-related topics often come up during small talk.

However, instead of the typical “What do you do?” question, try asking “What’s the best part of your job?” This question not only shows that you’re interested, but it also invites the other person to share something positive.

By focusing on the highlights rather than the mundane details, you’re more likely to spark a lively and interesting conversation. Plus, their answer might give you some valuable insight into their interests and passions.

Try this question next time you’re chatting with someone new – it’s a surefire way to keep the conversation upbeat and interesting.

6) How’s your family doing?

Family is a core part of our lives and asking about it can often lead to a deeper, more meaningful conversation. It shows that you care about them beyond the surface level, and are interested in their personal life.

Whether it’s asking about their kids, their parents, or even their pets, this question helps to establish a personal connection. Of course, it’s important to respect boundaries and not pry into sensitive issues.

I’ve found that this question often leads to shared experiences or mutual understanding, as family is something nearly everyone can relate to. So next time you’re looking to make your conversation more heartfelt, try asking about their family. It’s a simple yet effective way to show empathy and build rapport.

7) Do you have any travel plans coming up?

Traveling is one of those topics that can light up anyone’s eyes. Whether it’s an upcoming trip or a dream destination, we all have a place we’d love to visit.

Once, when I was at a social gathering, I was asked this question. I shared how I had always dreamed of visiting Japan to see the cherry blossoms in full bloom. What started as small talk turned into an engaging conversation about travel experiences and bucket lists.

Don’t hesitate to ask about travel plans. You might find common ground, or better yet, get an idea for your next vacation!

8) Can you recommend a good restaurant around here?

Although it might seem like you’re asking for a favor, this question actually serves as a great conversation starter. It gives the other person an opportunity to share their local knowledge and show off their taste.

Plus, it subtly communicates that you value their opinion, which can help establish a connection. Their recommendation might even become your new favorite spot!

When you’re in need of a conversation topic, don’t be shy about asking for a restaurant recommendation. You might be surprised at where the conversation – and the recommendation – takes you.

9) What’s your favorite way to unwind after a long day?

We all have our own ways of destressing after a busy day. Some people might prefer a quiet evening with a book, while others might opt for an energetic workout.

By asking someone about their favorite way to unwind, you’re not only learning more about their personal habits and interests, but you’re also opening up the conversation to a plethora of related topics.

Whether it’s discussing favorite books, sharing workout tips, or bonding over a shared love of cooking, this question is sure to lead to an engaging and personal conversation. When you’re making small talk, try asking about their favorite ways to relax – you might discover that you have more in common than you think!

10) It was great meeting you, can we keep in touch?

This isn’t just a polite way to end a conversation, it’s also a powerful way to open the door for future interactions. It shows the other person that you valued your chat and would like to continue the connection.

In the world of small talk, this phrase is the equivalent of a golden ticket. It allows you to take a fleeting conversation and potentially turn it into a lasting connection. So, don’t forget to use it!